We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
