i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
