as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize