I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
