new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
