Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize