Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
