Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize