Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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