is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
