i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Randomize
