dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize