He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
He shit in the fireplace
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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