im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Is Oprah even human
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
