thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
