He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
