Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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