the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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