She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize