So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize