I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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