yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
