My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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