so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize