Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
