She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize