there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
we're so committed to being not committed
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