I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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