So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
this will be a night to untag.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
sex in a hospital.. check
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
