we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
