Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
