The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
