The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
too bad you live with your parents still
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
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