There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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