I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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