don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
