they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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