her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
