TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
