Umm I'm too high to move.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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