youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize