I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize