thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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