they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
