I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
