A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
