I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
