I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
