uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
too bad you live with your parents still
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
There are leaves in my underwear?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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