Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I cut my penus on the lid.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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