I got chris browned last night
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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